A Spectator's Sport

Communication is all about relationships. Every time we say and/or do something another person is affected. This reality is all too obvious to think otherwise. Recently, for instance, a friend came to me to complain about an issue having nothing to do with me. But he knew I would be a "safe" audience as what he had to say would only be between the two of us. He talked and I listened. At the end of our time together he felt better about getting things off his chest. As for me, I felt better about giving him an opportunity to release some pent-up feelings that had been weighing on him for a good while. In that sense, he made me feel better. But I also feel troubled because he has a problem that has yet to be resolved.

So, even though the topic of this conversation had and has nothing to do with me, when it was over my thoughts and mood were altered. That occurrence is not unlike driving down the road and seeing the driver in the car ahead throw trash out their window. That action is about them but it definitely affects others. I mention these incidents because they illustrate how important it is to communicate with a strong dose of sensitvity. More often than we realize, people do pay attention to what goes on around them. Thus, to be unmindful that all we say and do affects others is to be insensitive, selfish and a poor communicator. Communication is not an act of isolation any more than it is an act without consequence.

For professionals, communication is an act of deliberation and purpose. Strategies are calculated. Publics are targeted. Communiques representing the overall strategy are enacted within economic parameters. But for the rest of us in our day-to-day lives, we tend to communicate in ways that do not reflect those qualitries. Unintended consequences are often one result. Should we "amateur communicators" now start being as precise as professionals try to be? Of course not. But it would not be a bad idea if we at least reminded ourselves from time to time that communication is, at the very least, a spectator's sport.