PR is All Around

Public relations is tough. For one thing, it is not easy coming up with a sustained campaign. But even more than that, the amount of competition is almost overwhelming. Every entity that puts forth a service or product is doing all it can all day, every day to promote itself. It is all that those of us on the receiving end of these non-stop messages can do to keep track of all that exists in a particular field; never mind trying to figure out which cereal, for instance, is the best or which toothpaste actually makes our teeth whiter. This represents the challenge of public relations as it relates to promoting "things."

This does not touch on the public relations work each of does on behalf of ourselves. The challenge of that far exceeds what any manufacturer faces when devising campaigns to boost sales. As journalist Will Storr observes in his most-interesting book, "Selfie," all of us are, "to some degree, anxious and hyperactive PR agents for our selves." Such effort revolves around the concept of trying to determine what others think of us. Regardless of our individual morality, I do not believe there is a single person who does not contemplate strategies on a daily basis that they believe will influence others to think of them in a positive way.

With the world population now in excess of 7 billion, that means there are billions of self-directed PR agents that go to work every day promoting the single product that means the most to them: themselves. Even if that person works as a public relations agent and has clients they have been assigned to promote, you can bet they are in all likelihood putting more energy into promoting themselves. After all, each of us is the hero or leading man or woman in our lives. We all want our hero to succeed, do well and have others like them as much as we do. Whether we like it or not, public relations is all around us.

The Difficulty of Success

Who determines whether we have communicated effectively? On the surface, such a question seems easy enough. The answer is "us." Surely, we know whether or not we have communicated well. Did I speak and/or write in a coherent style? Did we frame our message in a way that best relates to the needs and concerns of our audience? Did we actively listen to the audience's response? If the answer to each of these fundamental questions is "yes," then all is good. Any miscommunication is on the shoulders of the audience. Not us. If the desired results of our outreach fall short of their intended goal, then that, too, is more about the audience than us. Right?

Not necessarily. Perhaps a good analogy is a batter in baseball. The batter can be holding the bat properly, have a sturdy stance and a smooth swing, but all that does not mean they are going get a hit or even make contact with the pitch. Doing things as they should does not guarantee success. That is one of the frustrating and challenging aspects of communication. The audience has a definitive say in the matter. Thus, the answer to the question asked at the beginning of this entry is both the sender and receiver. And even then, a thumbs-up from both entities does not automatically equate with success. For that to occur, "success" must be defined with both parties agreeing upon the definition. 

For myself, I define "success" as two-fold: mutual understanding and ongoing dialog. I understand such a definition might not ring the bell of a client who wants to boost sales and has hired you to orchestrate a communication campaign to make that happen. The execution of your campaign can be flawless but that does not mean sales will increase. There are far too many variables driving the audience's response that one cannot always control. The playing field on which the act of communicating occurs is ever-shifting. As part of this, success often remain elusive, hard to grasp and hold onto - a goal not easily achieved.    

Finishing Each Other's Sentences

I admit that I make this entry with the full realization that upon reading it, folks will be tempted to label me as a cynic, an unromantic, or a real fuddy-duddy. To all that and more, I acknowledge your reaction and even see the logic of it. Still, I stick to my guns. I find the act of finishing another person's sentences to be annoying and wish people would not do it. (Full disclosure: I do it from time to time with my spouse and always admonish myself (to myself) when I do.) There are several reasons for my attitude. One is that I see it as an act of rudeness. A person is talking and suddenly, without invitation, the person with whom they are speaking interjects what they believe to be the thoughts or words of the speaker. How do they know what the speaker is going to say? Why not wait and find out?

The second and, to me, most important reason for having such a distaste for this act is that it is a blatant act of non-listening. Here's the scene: two people are talking. One begins talking about, say, what they did over the weekend. After awhile, he says, "Then I had to go to the store and......." He is suddenly interrupted when the other person interjects,".........some more cold slaw, baking soda and coffee beans." At this point, the conversation goes either one of two ways: The initial speaker concurs or has to correct what was just suggested. Either way, when that occurs, it makes for an awkward moment. It also knocks off balance the rhythm of the conversation.

I understand not everyone is as engaging when they talk as we might like them to be. They can be repetitive, dull and even confusing. Nevertheless, being an effective communicator requires active listening. This is because none of us are mind readers. Also, regardless of how close we might to that person, as Professor Nicholas Epley, a behavioral scientist, reported in his 2014 book, "Mindwise," often times we do not know what the person with whom we are conversing is going to say or what words they are going to use. Trying to finish their sentences is a crap shoot. In other words, exercise some patience and let that other person complete their thoughts or stories. It is better for you, them, and the overall exchange.