The Demands of Communication

As I was leaving a neighborhood grocery store the other day I noticed a woman drive up and let her three children off. I heard her say she was going to park the car and be back right back, but this did not seem to pacify the youngest whose cries for her not to leave him suggested he did not realize her abandonment was probably not going to last more than 60-90 seconds. This little scene got me to wondering how many of us react in mistaken or even inappropriate ways simply because we either misunderstand what has been communicated to us or because what was explained to us was not done in a way we adequately understood. My sense is this happens quite frequently.

There are, of course, many reasons why messages that come our way do not always resonate with us. Maybe we are distracted. Maybe we are not paying attention. Maybe we think we know what the other person is telling us, so we "hear" that even though it turns out the person is actually saying something else. Maybe the sender of the message has little credibility, so we have already decided to ignore any sound that comes from their mouth. The list of reasons goes on and on. And what about the sender of a message? Perhaps they have pre-judged their message to be so clear and straightforward that they make no effort to explain what it is they are saying. Perhaps they are in a hurry and do not have time to speak in a well-thought out manner. Perhaps they do not have a full appreciation of their audience and end up delivering a message that is beyond or below the audience's level of comprehension. The list of reasons in this case also goes on and on.

Successful, day-to-day communication can do much to reduce the amount of unwanted action and misdirected behavior in our own lives and even throughout the world. For this to happen, however, the responsibilities fall on the shoulder of all who send messages and all who receive them. In other words, that challenge belongs to us all. Granted, this is not always easy. Sometimes circumstances get in the way and make effective communication difficult. Take that Mom who simply wanted to park her car. Telling the kids "I'll be right back" was obviously not clear to her youngest. It just goes to show that communication demands constant viglience much like all else that is important in our lives.