Communication Bullies

I used to think one of the benefits of becoming a grown-up is that it meant never having to deal with a bully again. Perhaps it was in elementary or middle school when one or some of the bigger kids in class used their size to intimidate the smaller ones. Or maybe we were older when the tough guys in the neighborhood used their own special powers of persuasion to make us nervous and do what we had to do to avoid them. Either way, becoming a so-called adult meant putting those days behind us and moving into an environment where everyone treated everyone else with respect. Right? Wrong. Sadly, even in the world of grown-ups tactics of intimidation and people with power throwing their organizational weight around at the expense of those in weaker positions goes on.

Bullying is wrong in any environment and at any age. Granted, in the business world you may not see workers having their lunch money snatched away or actually being beaten up, but what does occur from time to time is just as ugly and hurtful: organizational superiors treating workers with disrespect, talking over them, belittling them and making them feel of no importance or no consequence. These so-called superiors do not use their fists. Instead, they use words, body language, and insensitive and even dishonest behavior. Even conjuring up these images is maddening. Watching it even more so.

Lincoln's observation about the best way to get a real sense of someone is by giving them power and seeing what they do with it holds as true today as it did over 150 years ago when he first made it. Whenever we communicate we project power. We speak and people listen. We act and people observe. For those few moments we are the focus of attention and, thus, have power. Bullies use their power unwisely and with disrespect. As it pertains to communication, for all who claim to dislike that kind of person, there remains only one course of action: honoring the attention upon you and respecting those who are giving it to you.