Jackasses and Carpenters

"Any idiot can write a blog." How well I know. This comment was made to me not too long ago by a colleague in a conversation we were having about social media. I confess that I only nodded when he said this and did not admit to being one of those, uh, idiots. Maybe I will come clean the next time I see him. But then again, maybe not. But whether I do, I must acknowledge there is much truth in that blunt statement. Let me explain by referring to a wise observation attributed to Sam Rayburn, the late Speaker of the United State House of Representatives, in 1953: "Any jackass can kick down a barn, but it takes a good carpenter to build one." Being critical without explanation or alternative suggestions, expressing off-the-cuff opinions not based on fact or experience, or acting without regard of consequences represent examples of actions of which all of us are capable. They are easy to do. By themselves, taking them does not matter how old or young we are, what our level of experience might be, how knowledgeable or ignorant we are, or even what our motivations might be. They can be taken for no other reason than to be heard and for our own satisfaction.

While there is nothing wrong with wanting to be heard and then taking whatever steps are necessary to satisfy that need or desire, it is important that action be viewed in perspective: any one can do it. By itself, there is nothing particularly special or overly beneficial about it. It is questionable whether this kind of action even advances a conversation or enlightens whatever subject that triggers it. More often than not, it is little more than self-serving noise. But attempting to add to or shed light onto a topic or to an observation, or in the case Congressman Rayburn's initial statement, build something, represents an attempt at the best kind of communication. In essence, that separates the responsible communicators from the self-serving noise makers.

All of us wanna-be communicators should try acting as carpenters when we decide to be heard. Make a connection. Build a relationship. Even if that interaction or outreach is short-term, do what you can to create a foundation and make the communication exchange one that is meaningful to both you and the receiver. This can be done in many ways: a message that includes the concerns or interests of others, being respectful and polite, or even a simple smile. What and even how we communicate says as much about us as it does the message we are trying to get across. I understand this kind of effort may make communicating more of a challenge, but at the same time - like a sturdy barn - doing so helps gives you, the communicator, and your message a much greater chance of having a positive impact.