Less Than Perfect

Often, I feel as if I am never more articulate than when I am driving in my car - alone - and making some sort of point about a subject on which I feel strongly. I do not stammer, fumble over my words, and everything I say is on-point and coherent. How come I am not that smooth when I am attempting to speak on the same subject in front of others? As best I can determine, it boils down to my being self-conscious about not sounding as thoughtful as I wish. I do not want to come across as being less than I like to think I am. Ironically, in my quest to sound thoughtful, I end up falling short of my goal because of my inner-fear of falling short. 

Is this a struggle that others share? Very likely. Communicating is one of the few actions we take where our egos and/or self esteem are very much on the line. The moment we open our mouths we are center stage. Those around us, even for a moment, turn their attention toward us. They await our words and - this is the tough part - within seconds pass judgment as to whether they believe we know what we are talking about, are making sense or are even worth passing attention to. If you are thinking that is pretty harsh, then you are absolutely right. I, for one, very much dislike subjecting myself to that kind of scrutiny.

Never mind that that instant judgment may be unfair or inaccurate. A great many of us on some level make instant assessments just as a great many of us on some level are not totally comfortable being in the position of  being assessed or judged so quickly. So, what can we do it about it? On the one hand, we can strive to be better listeners and not be so quick to give a person who is speaking a thumbs-up or thumps-down. On the speaking side, perhaps one way to proceed is to give ourselves permission to be less than perfect with the knowledge that no one is when it comes to communicating. If we have something to say, then by all means say it - but try giving it some thought first.