"Me" to "Us"

Not too long ago a book hit the shelves called "S**T My Father Told Me." The book proved to be so popular that it spawned a television program. While I never watched the show, what I read of the book I found to be amusing. It got me to thinking of my own father (not that I need any help with that). He's been gone 20 years now. Still, he remains a strong presence in my life. While I do not remember him as being a really funny guy or a person with a knack for putting forth many quotable quotes, he was a wise, introspective individual who viewed each day as an opportunity to expand one's level of knowledge.

One observation he did make to me once does apply quite well to communication. At the time, however, he meant it to be about marriage. Before marriage, he said, a person is about "me." After marriage, "me" becomes "us." There is no doubt in my mind this is true. Even if it is not, it is the attitude that drives me in my marriage. Regarding communication, I understand so much of what and how we communicate is "me-driven." Ideally, however, in should be "us-driven."Communication is about making and maintaining connections. Connections do not last without both parties striving to achieve mutual understanding.

Communication at its best involves more than one individual or publics acting toward the greater good. How they define that "greater good," of course, is unique to them and not necessarily applicable to others. Nevertheless, entities involved in a communication effort make it work by recasting their individual needs and goals into the context of what they have in common with their partners. These collaborators join forces to become the rising tide that raises them all. The challenge of communicators, then, is to put forth strategies that result in such mutually-beneficial alliances.